Friday, March 10, 2006

ode to mothers.

Presentation in english today.Random girls talking about random stuff..I wasn't really listening to them..any of them..except when Scherezade started presenting.I was shocked out of my LIFE,I don't know why..I've known who she is for quite some time..never really properly talked,but she's quite fun.She started talking about virtue and closeness with God,and backed it up with a personal experience.She talked about how her mother died just three months before 'o' levels..and what she went through,feelings,responsibilities.How she spent time with her manic depressive mother,how she handled it all.How she felt for her father who had lost the love of his life.I don't know,it was all so weird.I felt so sorry for her,and I went up and hugged her so tight and she started crying.I HATE it when people cry,so I started crying and Bia sucks at consoling too so she started crying,and by the time we got out of class,we were all sniffing and teary-eyed.Imagine not having a mother to tell stories to..not having the person in who's arms you've felt safe since you were a day old..not being able to shop together,laugh together,fight with,make fun of your dad with.Not having her there to guide you what to cook and how,to tell you what place is actually the cheapest to buy shoes,explain the little tid-bits that are actually the biggest problem-solvers in life.Not having her bid you farewell when you get married,not have her hold your child in her arms and rejoice on having acheived something miraculous and out of this world.We're all selfish sons of bitches and take everything for granted.I being the no.1 on this list.I seldom think what it would be like not having mom around..not having her roam around aimlessly yet so focused..to love me and rebuke me at the same time..to tell me how proud she is of me even though I've achieved absolutely nothing in this life.Its odd.I love you mom,and I try my best to show it.I'm sorry for all the times I fuck up and don't try as hard as I should.You're my inspiration to be a better person than what I am now,and my light at the end of the tunnel.God bless you.

2 comments:

Sameer said...

saw you on my blog. thanks.
And this is a really good piece. very sincere.

ManiK said...

Mother, remember the blink of an eye when I breathed through your body?

upwards over the mountain....give it a listen if you already haven't...