Friday, February 22, 2008

bullet-proof

someone unzipped my skin last night while i was in the shower.And can i just say,what a relief.It felt orgasmic to step outside myself and roam the pages of 'Where's Waldo?'.Because when you have no skin,you look like everybody yet nobody.I looked like one of those faces that you don't recognize when you first see it but then you take a closer look and you see that its you.Thats when the jigsaw falls into place.
so anyway,i turned up the heat till my skin was scorched and peeling and i surrounded myself with scents like oatmeal and shea butter,berries and cactus flower.
and when I slept,my teeth were clenched together,like a fist ready to destroy someone's anatomy.So when I woke,I hurt everywhere,made sure it felt like death or something like it.My body keeps me in bed and my mind rips us apart.I'm thinking of scrapbooks and jumping off balconies and pringles and sunsets.
best news of the week,ever?:I got my mother back.
we're back to secret kisses in the dead of the night and promises of always being there;in dreams even after she's gone.at this point in time in my life,she's the only one i believe.
and if you really want to break it down,it is about pride.
my pride.
the deadly sin that started it all,and the only thing I've got left.
you'll be needing me,but too bad.

Let down and hanging around
Crushed like a bug in the ground
Let down and hanging around

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